10 years! How long has it been?

I just missed the 10th year of my blog's existence!! It's actually 2 weeks ago, so now, here I am making up for the long absence..

I started this blog while I was in uni still figuring out myself and the only thing I knew I can do then was writing.. and I actually had the idea that if I start practising my writing and MAYBE earn something out of it, I might be able to do better things in the future (which means now..)

Then, my blog was mainly about a student's rants and blabs about life.. thinking that the world is just the campus and imagining what it would be like on the outside of it, aka reality.. Browsed through some of my older posts and realised.. I was kind of an attention seeker.. Although I would have hated to admit it.. publishing my life online for others to see is my way of gaining attention.. maybe I thought that people would see my writing but.. Ok, fine.. i would love the idea of having readers longing to know what is happening with my life and eagerly wait for the next blog post..

However and unfortunately, it did not happen. I was too lazy to maintain and would just post as I like.. then it became lesser and lesser as years passed.. and then, i became conscious of what I was sharing.. and suddenly have this weird thing of not wanting people I know to read about my life but I would prefer random readers who just happen to stumble upon my blog and found it interesting.. Which is why i find the idea of making my blog private a bit silly because this means I would have to invite people I know to read.. how else would i get readers? So, I kept my blog public but I hardly mention that I have one.. so those who just happen to find my blog and coincidentally knew me, would all be a coincidence.. How about my old readers who were mostly my friends?? Oh well, the typical attention span of a human being is pretty short.. blogging became out of trend and most my friends who used  to blog have now abandoned their blog, forgetting that it even existed.. So, how would they remember my blog when they have forgotten their own??

But, I am still struggling to update.. sometimes I would just log in and click around without posting anything.. Because... I don't know what to write about.. I need something happening in life to get the attention but my life is kinda dull.. and, picture blogs get the attention but I am not much of a picture person.. I don't really like seeing my face in photos so I hardly take any.. but now, with the wonderful invention of the smartphone with a pretty cool camera function with editing and stuff, I photograph more of my life, without my face in it.. but still, not interesting enough or I am just plain lazy to string up sentences to make it into a post..

I want to keep this blog alive.. which explains the once in a while update.. I will try to make it another 10 years.. Hopefully, you who I do not know, will still be reading..

Thank you
Signing off..
Toodles!

[Y]anking myself out of my comfort zone

The title is pretty misleading because I thought I was out of my comfort zone but I somehow managed to find my way back...

Since I have started my new job, I only became busier, not only with the full-time 9-6 position but the other odd jobs that came to me by fate, by luck during the year. I had the opportunity to teach Chinese to Koreans; teach Korean to Malaysians; translate articles, books and reports from Chinese to English and vice versa, and even did a little Korean translation for the fun of it; transcribe which made me realise that I actually hate voice messages more that I thought I did (I will have another blog post about how voice messages irritates me); writing articles and posting them online to public; helping out in events and even manage to gain some experience in event organising and management, and many other odd jobs that takes up most of my time...

Being so filled with work will usually mean one thing... I would not have much time for other stuff.. Of course, my family would be my first priority and I do stay at home most of the time so that means my time with friends would be very much lesser than before... I am harder to date now, as some of my friends would comment... I am usually full during weekends and nobody wants to meet during weekdays knowing that they can't stay late and they would have to work tomorrow. It's not that I have no work, just, I am working everyday so weekdays, weekends actually made no difference and I prefer weekdays since it is crowd-less..

And so, with that I have also cut down on traveling, unless it's happening with the family.. Many would have question my decision on "missing out the world" and rather spend my money on commitments.. To be very honest, at the beginning after this decision was made, I felt green with envy every single time I see people posting the travel photos on social media, and it made my felt sulky and jealous which was actually really bad.. Then, after a while, after being able to get used to this coz people will just keep traveling, I have overcome the envy of seeing travel photos of others... I now  would just browse through and not feel anything since it is a fact that i could not afford traveling now.

And then.... here comes the comments from people who don't understand.. "traveling does not require a lot of money, you don't need to be a millionaire to travel", "you are losing out the chance of seeing the world", "traveling is my source of life, I really don't know how you could just stop traveling for years." and many more comments that look concerned but sound hurtful.. Yes, I am not going to travel for the time being unless it is with my family because I have reached the age where I prefer spending more time with family.. Why am i doing this? I have saving for commitments, I am not as blessed as some people who have an easy life without having to worry about monetary issues and being able to travel twice almost every year.. My life was once easy until it made a downturn and now I have to work on my own to get the old one back..

People would say that "life is short" YOLO, why would I spend my money on commitments rather than giving myself a chance to see the world.. Well, i was lucky enough to have been to several places during the past few years and I am really grateful of that luck but that luck ran out and I must accept the fact..

I would prefer not to depend on people when it comes to commitments.. even though it is for my family and not my personal commitments... I would prefer paying for the house my family is staying, getting all the furniture, being able to afford having my own place to stay and all my basic necessities..

If i could afford to support myself and my family one day without going hungry, that is my life goal.. and traveling comes after being able to afford things.. if that day every come, I would be so freaking proud of myself.. I just can't imagine my parents coming to me and suggest that I should discuss with my "husband" (provided if this person exists) to get a new house or anything that requires quite a sum of money that I would not have in the bank..
If that situation ever happen, (and the individual named husband exists) I hope I could tell my parents that "It's ok. I can afford."

Oh My Gawd... that would have been the coolest thing I have ever said in my life!! Being able to support not only myself but my family as well, without the help of the still-unsure-of-his-existance-husband

I really hope that one day.. just one day.. and i hope it could happen soon.. the day when I can tell my parents I can afford whatever they need.

Ooooh, can't help feeling proud just thinking of this..

Alright, time to dream
Signing off
Toodles!

Just a date

Born on the 11th? You'll Have 1 True Love

You may watch someone from afar before you finally decide to make your move. It takes a long time for you to develop an attraction to someone. Generally, you prefer to pick who you love. Anyone who tries to rush you is in for some heartache. Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 1 You are most compatible with people born on the 2nd, 11th, 20th, and 29th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

Blogthings: 100's of Fun, Free Quizzes!

Only one sounds good and bad at the same time.. It's good that you would only need to love once and get it right... 

Colors~~

It has been so hard to keep on posting blogs, I have resorted back to my old way of keeping my blog alive, which is through random quizzes and tags...



 

Your Color is Yellow

You are an energetic and cheerful person. You have a lot of psychological and physical strength. People find you inspiring and rely on you when times are tough. You always have something to give. You lift others' spirits and are a natural morale booster. You help others find happiness. You are a good listener and a true friend. You lend clarity and strength to those around you.

What's Your Feng Shui Color?

Blogthings: 100's of Fun, Free Quizzes!

Yellow was never my favourite colour.. even when the yellow ranger from Mighty Morphine Power Rangers was Asian, I never fancied yellow... but it seems, yellow keeps following me when I do not have a choice.. I remember having to wear the yellow Physical Education (P.E) shirt when I was in primary school, then I switch school and STILL end up with yellow.. THEN, i graduated and started secondary school, and guess what?? I was still Yellow!! I really don't get it, people get to change the colours of the sport houses as they change schools but I was forced to stick with yellow.. I didn't have a choice to choose my sports house colour then... 

So,  I would avoid shirts and tops that are yellow coz they remind me of P.E. 

Besides, being a chinese who have yellow skin, wearing yellow will make me look like a banana.. 

And now, yellow is BACK as my fengshui colour.. sigh.. I guess this is fate..

Oh yellow~~

You Should Stay Away From Black

You are a compassionate and caring person. You are big on forgiveness. You try not to get weighed down by the world's problems. You do your best to help, and that's all you can do. The color black sometimes represents oppression and even hatred. You don't want anything to do with that. There is also a cool meanness to black, and that goes against every fiber of your being.

What Color Should You Stay Away From?

Blogthings: 100's of Fun, Free Quizzes!

Some people have a cupboard full of black shirts.. so if this is their result, they might go crazy and burn their wardrobe.. oh well, black is like the universal colour that matches with everything... having to stay away from black might be a sign telling me to jump out from my comfort zone which I am very reluctant to do so...

Just a random post on a random day to just prevent my blog from going dead..

signing off~~

Toodles! 

[X]OXO Procrastinator..

Sorry for the meaningless post previously, I thought I could come out with something entertaining but I didn't realise that my ideas do not have any tolerance to long waits... so as I dragged, the ideas kinda flew off and left me with an empty brain and a supposed-to-be-emotionally-entertaining blog post.. 

In that case, I could say that I really shoud take it easy on procrastinating... I guess it's just the fact of being purely lazy that stimulates my procrastination hormones and made the whole situation even worse... As you all might know or might not, I shall not assume things.. I have a permanent 9 to 6 job from Mondays to Fridays and alternate Saturdays, besides that I also have a handful of part time free lance stuff to earn some extra income. Being working full time on weekdays does affect the mood of doing more work when you reach home. Hence it became the best excuse for me to procrastinate when it come to my other jobs.. 

My freelancing jobs include, teaching, translating, writing articles, proofreading, transcribing and some other minor jobs that pays... you might say you can't procrastinate as a teacher.. when the time comes you have to go to class and teach.. oh well, i procrastinate preparing my teaching materials.. i usually prepare them the night before class.. and my classes are usually in the morning.. if it's an afternoon class, i guess i will only be preparing on that morning itself.. then my other jobs, all allows me to complete them at the comfort of my own home.. as long as i meet deadlines.. oh yes.. DEADLINES.. these materials are usually given with an ample time towards the deadline but due to me procrastinating, those deadlines always seem very demanding where i only have that limited period of time to complete.. 

So I shall say... although it's already March and I even procrastinated for my March post which is usually about my plans after turning a year older post-birthday and stuff.. I will never make it as a professional blogger.. so here i am, amusing myself with my blog posts.. blogging for self amusement...

However, as much as i always procrastinate.. i know i must get the job done.. even if it takes off hours from my sleep.. yea, i deserve that coz i should have started earlier..

I guess I should make this a new year resolution.. procrastination is in my genes.. so i guess my resolution will be to finish my work a day before deadline.. hopefully...

signing off..
toodles!

Better to take a risk or do nothing?

I guess I have been fading of the blogsphere... Not for the longest time, i believe I have been away longer but just with no inspiration to blog or even open the url link of my blog... Usually I would have the urge of blogging but no specific topic came to mind, so in the end I would most probably be blabbing rubbish and things that make no sense all chained together into a blog spot just so you could catch a grasp of bits and pieces of my life here and there... And so, what made my urge of blogging came back??

 

I got this quote while playing with some of the quizzes that some friends on facebook shared... It was really surprising coz I am no risk-taker.. I prefer things to be planned and executed the way i pictured so that the result will be more or less how i predicted.. 

So, i guess this quote appeared hinting that I should change my perspective of things..

and then... I will continue on the next post..

Sorry for this..

signing off

toodles!